:)Thanks guys... It gnaws at me every day . . . and has really all my life since quite young. I remember being young . . . and astounded that everyone, especially the adults, were apparently utterly oblivious to the monumentality of the sheer fact of life. What's it all about? Why is no one seeking, imploring, yearning . . . to find the meaning and purpose of it? Is this not astounding on its face . . . I would wonder . . . that here is this world, here are we . . . alive, experiencing existence; but then, the huge, unremitting bottom line at the end--death? Does no one want to understand?
My greatest fear was that something would happen upon growing up and I too would end up as one of these thoughtless, robotic creatures . . . simply moving about according to this or that stimuli or social expectation--no life in the eyes, no wonder, no desperation to find and obtain the truth.
The idea that there was no truth to be found was on its face absurd to me, so giving up or shrugging it off was out of the question.
No, I knew that for there to be this yearning--this constant drive to find the answer--meant that somewhere, somehow there indeed must be a solution. I was "thirsty" . . . because there was water to be had. I was "thirsty" . . . because I was actually alive . . . and the finding of that water meant life would go on.
Oh, if our eyes were truly opened . . . we would be horrified at the sin with which we are constantly engaged! We do not love God. It is only by His grace that we are saved from our desperate condition.
If we loved God as we should, as we will . . . we would rather die a thousand torturous deaths than commit one "small" sin against Him. But we hardly believe in Him. Barely we do. Instead, we love and believe in the world and in other creatures. He is not fooled by our professions. If we could really see the depths of our hypocrisy we would fall to the ground, unable to stand, mortified at the charade we play . . . as if it is getting us by.
No, we are in dire, dire straits. We are excited and enticed by a thousand things before we are thrilled and enticed by God. Tell us we are the winners of a money lottery and we are ecstatic, leaping for joy, laughing, bursting with new life. . . .
We claim to be saved by the grace of God, "chosen" for eternal life in fellowship with that God . . . and it slightly registers at all.
We don't believe. We don't see. We don't care. We don't love God. . . .
It is terrifying to behold the true situation. . . .
Furthermore, we care more about what other people think of us than what God is seeing from us. We are afraid to proclaim the Gospel; afraid to lose our jobs, our friends, our possessions, our position in the rat race. . . .
Yet most of those people and things we fear more than God . . . are themselves slated for the fire. They have nothing to say--no power over our souls. . . . Many of them are actually children of the devil and are satisfied to be going to Hell to live with their father, the devil. Yet we worry what they think of us--what they might do to us . . . if we proclaim God's truth and warn them of His wrath. We fear man, woman, child . . . more than the Lord.
How does He view that? What lying, sniveling, cowardly wretches we are who claim to be the adopted royalty of Heaven!
The day starts . . . and it's ME ME ME ME all the day long; with perhaps a few seconds here and there with some half-hearted, vague looking in God's direction. Then we go about sinning with abandon all the day long with no care or little care or even knowledge of the seriousness of our crimes piling up. "One day I'll get it together and honor God" we say to ourselves. . . . "But first, there's a bunch of things I want to do for myself and my idols--my own gods. . . ."
Words can't describe the magnitude and consequence of our situation--our very being. We are made in the image of God, made by the very God of all the universe and all creatures . . . and are to be His representatives on this world in space and time. We have been given that incredible, undeserved, HUGE opportunity and gift! We have the opportunity--being made in the image of God and being the living temples of His Holy Spirit--to be His representatives, giving Him glory--to all the world.
Yet we profane our bodies, our minds, our hearts, our souls . . . with the filth of the enemy, nonchalantly, blaspheming our loving, benevolent Father's name through our daily thoughtless, Spirit-less habits, deeds, words, agendas, "dreams" . . . dragging His image through the mud--through the perverse and vile evil of the rebellious, sinful world. . . .
Where we could instead be living according to conscience, to the Spirit within . . . magnifying His glory and righteousness . . . in ourselves, through ourselves outward as a shining, purifying and exposing light to the world!
We would be horrified if we were to clearly and bluntly see how casually we are living and using His grace . . . compared to the stakes and glories at hand. Deception is in key use by the enemy to keep us lulled and dull and habitual, missing the glory to be given, shown, lived EVERY DAY . . . if we but put ourselves, in priority, to love God with all our heart and with all our soul and with all our strength and with all our mind.
We don't even really try, do we? Barely. . . .
And then we have the audacity to be outraged and self-satisfied as we look at the wicked world merely being the wicked world. . . .
Oh Lord, give us love of You! Give us the eyes to see the real situation--how dire it is--our lackluster devotion and meager faith . . . while we chase after chimeras and the lures of the enemy. Let us burn with a fire to know You, love You, serve You, glorify You EVERY DAY, in front of the world, unafraid, excited, in power, in grace, in truth!